We went to see Barry Cryer last night; so if you've got a problem with this gag, please take it up with him.
A woman went into a pet shop and said she wanted to buy a parrot. The chap behind the counter showed her some and she chose one she liked - but he pointed out that it tended to use bad language as it had lived in a brothel previously. It was only £20 so she decided to take a risk and bought him.
When she got home she took the cover off the cage and the parrot said 'Nice place.'
Her two daughters came in and it said 'Lovely girls.'
Then her husband came home and the parrot said 'Hello Keith!'
Do you like my shoes btw? We were at a 60s themed evening at a local restaurant over the weekend (fish fingers, coq au vin, Black Forest gateaux - you get the picture) and these were my brothel creepers of choice. I wore them to my step daughter's wedding a few years back and they've been in the box ever since.
Here's some classic footage of Barry Cryer fronting Jokers Wild; ever wonder where they got the format for Mock The Week?