Tuesday 17 February 2015

Turning left

'You're going the wrong way'

When getting to the top of the flight stairs and boarding a plane, I've never turned left. I've never been bing-bonged whilst waiting at the gate and been told that it's my lucky day. Never had the reclining chair that folds flat into a bed or been served courtesy Mo√ęt at 10,000 feet by a glamorous flight assistant. No, I've always been herded right with the rest of cattle class in search of my lousy billet; to the scuzzy plastic seat with zero legroom and all the associated charms associated with economy air travel.

Oh to be on the other side of the curtain. Just once. Do they still have real fireplaces through there?


  1. What a pad. D'ya reckon there was a swimming pool next door too?

    In a past life, I had the job of organising a lot of international travel for the execs. I worked with. A lot of airlines/hotels offered free trips to the humble minions like me to sample their services so I had the good fortune to travel on the other side of that curtain a few times. I remember feeling very small and skanky compared to two rich and beautiful Arab sisters I was sat next to one time on Emirates (they were kind enough to offer me a spray of their expensive perfume, and kind enough too not to mention that I probably needed it). Mind you, turbulence feels the same whatever side you're on...

    1. That's right. And, when it goes down, you all go down together.